Joe's assistant in the kitchen has been "clean" for about a year now. He lives at a half-way house within walking distance of the restaurant, hates it, lives with 14 or so other guys and has been looking for a place of his own. He's been working with us since June.
Before the half-way house he spent a year in rehab in Scranton, PA (might as well be W-B, it's so close). One of our customers, a correctional institute officer, recently remarked that he looks like he may have done time. Just out of the blue....
Anyway, I guess I just don't know what to expect, if anything, because I truly have no idea of what he's going through. When I asked him what he was addicted to, he said "everything" and gave his arm a tap, you know. So I don't know if that means crack or heroin or if they're both the same thing or if he meant both.
He's got a 22 year old son in college, a mom he sees at least once a week, and an ex-wife he's still hung up on, though they've been divorced for 20 years. He said he was always strung out so ruined the marriage.
He's quiet and rigid, never asks much or interacts....I said to him the other day, I guess we'll never see you with a lampshade on your head (trying to break tension cause he's sooo stoney sometimes -- it actually feels like an accomplishment if we get him to smile) and he said, not as long as I'm not drinking...
Oh, and he's got a giant scar across his head from a motorcycle accident which he says didn't really mess up his brain....hmmmmm.
So this guy's obviously got some stories in him. Whenever I get courageous enough to ask him something personal, he answers, but he doesn't ever offer anything up spontaneously. Very regimented. Still addicted to nicotine.....and his hand shakes really badly sometimes.
I guess I'm just wondering if there are things I should be aware of or look out for, since he seems like he was "hard-core" (ugh with the labels!). I try to act like a hard-ass, but I'm pretty gullible, really. The fact that he still loves his wife and mom are reassuring -- it means he doesn't hate women, and with me being his employer and everything... especially after our first cook -- well, that fact helps me to not take his stoney exterior too personally. He's also on depression meds. Like I said, he's not afraid to share, but I don't like to pry too much. I oscillate between wanting to offer him a room to wishing he'd quit.....I'm so weird.
And I'm just now realizing as I write this and admit to myself I will probably never board out a room to a male (other than family) that I have been conditioned to fear men.
Now there's a hmmm to ponder...
hymn to ponder
him to ponder
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